The Lord sent me a burning bush. As I prepared for a personal retreat, I prayed that God would meet me in a special way. I needed to have a moment with Him.
I was struggling with where life had taken me. I lacked understanding and sought answers only God could give me.
My Wilderness Experience
I could really relate to Moses. Everything was going well, and then bam! Life halted in an instant. You see, I had gone through a traumatic time with the birth of my fourth child at 29 weeks of gestation. I was devastated and struggled for weeks because things were so touch-and-go with him.
This put me in a tailspin that threw me into a brick wall. We spent two months in the NICU and then two years quarantined at home so his lungs could grow without compromise.
I associate this with Moses fleeing to the wilderness after murdering the Egyptian. Moses never would have left the palace, so God used a hard circumstance to get him to flee. And I would never have slowed down my life, which had been a roller coaster of stress and extreme busyness. I believe God used the early delivery of my son to draw me out of busyness and into my wilderness.
During my time in the wilderness, I had the most amazing time with the Lord. My wilderness was about unlearning what I thought I should be doing and relearning what God wanted for me and my life. I spent numerous hours a week with Him and learned to hear Him clearly. I studied His Word and studied myself. Yes, I went within to examine my heart. There was lots of crying over my lack and my need for more of Him. I experienced lots of pruning. Having this time set apart for my transformation was a gift.
But something was still missing. I couldn't put my finger on it. I was struggling with the changes in my life, relationships that had dwindled, and my own expectations of what I thought life should look like.
My Burning Bush
Having this association with Moses and envisioning my life coinciding with his, I embarked on a journey to my own Mount Horeb, my personal retreat.
The speaker that weekend was none other than Glenna Salsbury. The Lord prompted me to approach her and ask her a question that led us to an hour-long visit.
As she poured into me, I realized that, just like Moses, I sat before my burning bush. It was a reflection of what Moses may have sensed being on Holy ground. I felt this might be the closest I would ever get to that kind of moment.
I stood on holy ground. Here is where God revealed His holiness before Moses, and now me. The words Glenna spoke over me were straight from God’s lips. Glenna didn't know my heart, but our God did. I had been crying out to Him for understanding, and He knew exactly what to say to change my course.
There was no physical evidence of fire, but I can tell you there was a supernatural spiritual fire. It was nothing short of the quality of God’s holiness purifying and refining my heart.
God’s holiness involves separation. He had set me apart from everything else He had made. He was showing me He is my Creator, I am His creation, and He has a plan and purpose for my life. He wanted to teach me something and He needed to separate me in order for me to not only receive it, but apply it.
God manifested His sheer majesty as the Holy Spirit was present and active at that moment in time. He was preparing me for the next season of my life. He showed me what I was missing.
He prompted Glenna to share grace with me. God, in His desire to answer the cry of my heart, revealed that I was missing the understanding and ability to live out grace.
God made Himself very real. He showed me the burning bush was not to consume but to save, to deliver those who had been enslaved and suffering in Egypt. I too was in need of deliverance.
Not only was I in need, I was in training. Through my experience with God, Grace, and Glenna (representing the angel at my burning bush), I was to help lead others out of bondage and into a deeper relationship with God.
Just as God sent Moses to Pharaoh to deliver His people, He sent me to Glenna for my deliverance and preparation for my assignment.
I learned to release the burdens of my expectations. I learned that grace enables us to do that which, in and of ourselves, we are not capable of. To love and release, to live with a joy that you will not surrender for any reason, to desire unity and peace, and most of all, to have a closer walk with the Lord.
Does this mean I’m perfect? Not a chance. Do I still exercise my flesh? Absolutely. But those moments are less and less over time. Self-control and temperance are being sharpened.
God’s grace is guiding my grace to see the good in all people and be willing and available for anyone in need of . . . a burning bush!
We all struggle with something and we all often sin against God and man. I have learned that grace gives us the ability to humble ourselves, release expectations, forgive, ask for forgiveness, and walk out His love, joy, and peace. I am an imperfect creation being perfected by my Creator.
Now our Lord Jesus Christ himself, and God, even our Father, which hath loved us, and hath given us everlasting consolation and good hope through grace, comfort your hearts, and stablish you in every good word and work. 2 Thessalonians 2:16,17
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